You’ve wanted your mother to consider assisted living for a long time, and she finally has. It’s been a difficult road supporting her, and even though you understand her desire to remain home as long as she can, things have progressed to the point where it is more than you can handle by yourself. You did your research and realized assisted living is the best option.
Now, once she has decided on this, there are a few things you can do that will help her get ready for this move to assisted living.
1. Ask what she wants or can take with her.
Before trying to figure out what she may want to bring along with her to assisted living, it would be best to speak to someone at the facility and find out what personal effects, furniture, pictures, and other items are permitted.
Some assisted living communities may not allow a goldfish, for example. Some might not allow people to bring pictures that are larger than a certain size. They may also limit the number of framed photos, furniture items, mementos, and other tokens of a life well lived simply because of space and other factors.
Once you understand what the facility allows, find out what she would prefer to bring along with her, keeping within the confines of permissible items.
2. Create a workable plan for the next weeks or months.
It may be helpful to figure out what needs to be packed up, moved into storage, given away, or simply gone through and donated or tossed out from the home she has lived in for many years. The longer a person stays in the same place, the more items they tend to accumulate. She can’t bring all of it (or nearly most of it) with her, so you and her will have to figure out a plan for those items.
When you create a plan, write it down or print it out so she can understand each day, what she or you or both will be doing to prepare for this move to assisted living. The more visible and clearly written those plans are, the easier the transition will be.
3. Hire help or find enough family/friends for move-in day.
There may not be a lot to do on move-in day, but then again, depending on the facility, there might be. If you are moving furniture, make sure you have adequate help to do it. Don’t expect staff at the assisted living facility to assist with this. They might, but most likely not.
Just make sure you have enough help and even emotional support for your mother on the day she moves to assisted living.
4. Ask what concerns or questions she may have about it.
As the move-in date approaches, a person like your mother may have doubts or reservations. She may not know how to express those concerns and may start hemming and hawking about everything.
Sit down and calmly ask what concerns or questions she may have about this upcoming move. Listen to what she has to say. Don’t try to argue with her or shoot her concerns down; simply listen. She may realize then that you really do have her best interest at heart and these are natural feelings everyone will go through when they’re moving out of a place they have lived for so long.
If you or an aging loved one are considering Assisted Living in Collinsville, IL, or surrounding areas, please contact the caring staff at Knollwood Retirement Community today at (618) 226-5755
Offering seniors age 65 and older a wealth of amenities to retain as much independence as they are able, with support, in a home-like environment in our supportive living community.
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